How's your Mental Load?

Hi there!

Sawasdee Ka from Bangkok!

I hope you are having a good week.

I am sat in a hotel room in Bangkok getting ready for the final day of a week-long women in leadership offsite. It's been an amazing week of deep conversations with some incredible women.

We have been exploring important subjects such as navigating organisational bias and facing our internal limiting beliefs as well as learning about our unique leadership styles and how we want to show up in the world.

One thread that I have particularly resonated with is the working parent's mental load.

The few days before I left for Bangkok, I was frazzled and quite frankly, overwhelmed. I felt like the to-do list was constantly growing. I was trying to get all my other work done, ensure the kids have everything they need for school the next week, write lists and whiteboard notes for everyone, think about dinner and what groceries they will all need, leaving money for unforeseeable...the list went on and on.

When I boarded the plane, I was still thinking of what I had missed and was texting the family to again remind them of stuff. It was a bit neurotic, to be honest!

After a day or so, and with my head fully in the game here, I started to relax and let go of what was going on at home. And guess what? They were FINE!

I would read messages at the end of the day on the home WhatsApp chat and all sorts had gone on that day - the car was low on charge, the dog needed to go to the vet, the kids were stuck in a traffic jam on the way to school, someone forgot their P.E. Kit. The usual stuff.

And my husband handled it all like a pro.

The next few days were the same as well. In fact, they seemed to be functioning even better! My youngest was up and ready for school way before she needed to be and with no dramas - something that rarely happens without a lot of nagging from me!

As I reflected on all of this, I thought, "Maybe I overcomplicate things and maybe I take on too much and should let others in the house handle more."

We hear a lot about women taking on the majority of the caring responsibilities at home and it weighing heavy on their mental load on top of their professional work. And I do believe that we have a natural pull towards caring for our loved ones. But I wonder if we perhaps take on too much and unintentionally push out our partners or others in our lives who are equally as capable and deserving of this caring responsibility.

So I had a chat with my husband, praised him for his awesome work, said thank you, and then promoted him to Chief Operating Officer! 😂

What are you holding on to that isn't serving you or your family, that perhaps you could offload to someone else?

Have a great weekend, I'm off for another foot massage tonight 😉

With love,